Thankful Thursday

Luminous Purse Review — My First 2020 Obsession

Posted on January 16, 2020January 17, 2020 by Babz

In general, I’m really not much into purses. I carry one almost every day (for the last few years), but there haven’t really been too many that caught my eye in a special way. That is, until I found this purse. Ever since it came in, I’ve been taking it literally everywhere. Mama Zombie even gave me a little grief because I took it out to the back yard with me when I went — but can you blame me? This is the most glam purse I have ever owned, and it was under $50 delivered!

I originally fell in love with this style of bags sometime during 2019 back-to-school season (a stationery nerd’s favorite time of year!). The Office Max near me had a gorgeous backpack with this lovely reflective triangle design… And I was in love. At the time, I didn’t even realize it was a “luminous” bag — I thought it was just a “Chameleon” bag. (Does anyone else remember when Chameleon-painted cars were the epitome of cool? No? Just me?) However, I was not in love with the $80 price tag, so I stuck the expensive idea to the back burner and moved on with my life.

I didn’t completely move on from the design, though. I kept an eye on Amazon and Wish, just waiting for the deals to drop… And finally they did! Once they fell under $30, I was on it. I had to have this purse I’d been obsessing over for months. When it finally came in, it was like a match made in handbag heaven. I fully intend to use this purse every single day until the straps rip apart at the seams (which seems like it’s going to be a long time).

Interested in getting your own luminous purse? Check out my review and see if it’s going to fit into your life. (This isn’t a sponsored review, by the way — I just really, really love this bag.)

Overview

(As a small side note, if you would have asked me a year ago — or even two months ago! — whether I’d ever be writing a product review for a purse, I would’ve thought you were crazy for even asking. But, here we are. It’s 2020 and I’m obsessed with a purse.)

Let’s get started with the outside first, since that’s what we see first. This bag is covered in soft, supple PU leather material that makes it reasonably durable, reasonably inexpensive, and reasonably easy to clean. However, this isn’t just your standard faux leather bag — the PU leather outer is made from individual shapes attached to a soft lining in a seemingly haphazard fashion. I know what you’re thinking — fake leather pieced together on a lining doesn’t sound very glamorous, but that’s all part of the appeal of this deceptively-complex bag. Because the outside of this bag is done in separate layers, the shape of the bag can morph depending on its contents. This is a really cool feature that means even an almost-empty bag will have a unique look. (And, when I say unique, I mean it — this bag is going to look a little bit different every time you set it down somewhere.)

The inner composition leaves out all the eccentricities of the outside and instead opts for a simple layout: one large pocket, one phone pocket, one small pocket, and one zippered pocket. I’m sure we’ve all had a bag with that setup before; it’s nothing groundbreaking. The inner liner feels slightly slick to the touch; it’s plasticky like a windbreaker. I’m not really sure what that means in terms of its durability or waterproofness, but I feel confident that the liner will at least corral a pen leak, should I encounter one while using it.

And, for those of you who are most interested in the size of the bag: It’s huge! Boasting a tremendous 31 inch circumference (approximately 79 cm), this allows the bag to present as up to 15 inches (approximately 38 cm) wide. I say up to because, as previously mentioned, the outer design will change the shape of the bag slightly every time you put it down. This isn’t an inconvenience, although I did initially think it might be. You can also rest assured that your items will be safely tucked away, since the bag stands about 13 inches tall (33 cm), not including the straps.

Curious about those straps? The shorter ones come already attached to the bag, at a length of 14 inches (approximately 35.5 cm). The longer strap took a bit of work to get attached, but is absolutely necessary if you don’t want to carry this thing on your arm all day. Since I planned to fill this thing with journals, planners, pens, and some yarn, I needed that longer strap. As installed, it measures about 40 inches long (roughly 102 cm). There are supposed to be some little loops over the long straps, probably to make them look a little more polished, but I almost immediately lost those in my car trying to get my purse set up in the pickup line at the school. Whoops!

The Good

The size. This bag has an AMAZING capacity – I’ve joked that I could probably fit a gallon of milk in this thing, and while that’s funny to say, I’m also almost completely sure it’s true. (I don’t drink milk and I buy my water 3 gallons at a time, so I don’t really have the means to check.) Whether you’re a big-item-carrier or a tons-of-small-items carrier, this bag has got you covered. Despite the large size, the profile is relatively small thanks to the shapeshifting 3D quality of the multi-piece design.

The weight. For a purse of this size and this construction, you’d expect it to be a bit hefty, but it’s not. Even after I filled it practically to the brim with all the crap that I usually carry (and a few things from the rest of the family), the weight was manageable. Empty, it’s practically weightless. Since the design is really a series of appliques attached to a soft liner, it’s only about as heavy as a reusable market bag.

The feel. The design is made of buttery-soft PU leather appliques with a slight powdery texture. The straps feel almost like a soft rubber, which distributes the weight effectively and also carry the signature color-changing material from the design itself.

The look. Obviously, this bag is beautiful when the light hits it just right — but probably my favorite thing is that it’s gorgeous in any light. Also, because the base material is so soft and flexible, every time you set the bag down it’s like you’ve got a brand-new, unique piece of modern art at your side. (Not that you’ll ever want to put it down!) I almost want to get a display case for this thing, but that would mean I’d have to leave it behind sometimes, and right now I’m just not prepared to do that.

The versatility. No matter what type of bag you prefer, there’s a luminous bag for you. I got the large size because I carry a lot of stuff daily (and don’t drive!), but for those looking for a smaller bag (or a backpack, or a wallet…) there are options for you, too. Eventually I’ll probably collect them all, but for now I couldn’t be happier with the one I picked.

The Bad

Honestly, my only real complaint with this purse is that it doesn’t have lots of pockets and compartments. For a bag of this size, you’d expect that there would be some sort of organization system in place; there’s not. This is more like a tote bag, with one main large pocket, one zippered pocket, and two smaller open-top pockets for your phone, cigarettes, or whatever you need easily accessible. Everything else falls into the void. However, if you (like me) plan to use an organizer insert or smaller pouches to corral your things, there’s plenty of room for all the pouches you want to stash inside. The wide open space is roomy enough to fit four full-sized cookbooks and two novels — it’s definitely big enough to stash away your notebooks, journals, planners, and whatever other essentials you need to take with you.

Another (minor) complaint is that this thing is a fingerprint magnet. That’s not such a big deal, since the smudges are easy enough to just wipe away, but for those who are wanting a flawless look (read: not me), it may take a little daily maintenance to keep this handbag looking fresh-from-the-box perfect. That’s definitely not a deal breaker for me, especially since these little fingerprint smudges don’t show up in pictures. (Can you tell which of the pictures were taken before Baby Dragon got her fingers all over it, and which were taken after? Because I barely can, and I’m the one who took all the pictures.)

Conclusion

When all is said and done, this bag is beyond worth it now that the prices have dropped and competition abounds. The designers really knew what they were doing with this one. You can find the exact purse reviewed in this post here. Backpacks are here and here, wallets here, and makeup bag here. Enjoy!

Thankful Thursday

5 Reasons I’m So Grateful I Didn’t Marry My First Love

Posted on January 2, 2020March 22, 2020 by Babz

It might be a little early to start thinking about Valentine’s Day already, but this year, I’ve got a little extra to say — so why not start it out there?

My wife is not my first serious, long-term, live-in relationship. She’s the second serious love, the third long-term, and the fifth live-in. (What can I say? That lesbian Uhaul stereotype didn’t come out of thin air.) And, back when we first met, everyone — including me — was focusing on the fact that this wasn’t the first for me. It took a long time for me to realize that the first doesn’t always mean the best… and here’s why.

[1] I was young and dumb.

Our first love tends to be someone frivolous in the grand scheme of things. When we’re young, we can misattribute smaller feelings and inflate them so that they fill up our entire world. My world was so consumed by my first love and the fact that I had come out for her that I never thought I’d be able to find someone who made me feel the same way. I stayed in it for a lot longer than I should have, just because I thought it was my one chance at love.

Here’s the thing, though. Just because you won’t love anyone else the same way you love your First Love does’t mean that you’ll never love anyone else. It doesn’t even mean that the first love was real love. In my case, my first love was a catalyst for the rest of my life — she taught me what I wanted and what I didn’t want. But if I had married her, I would’ve resented the things I didn’t want by now.

[2] I didn’t know what I wanted.

“I don’t know what I want, but I know I need you.” I said this to my first love probably more times than I can even count during the six years I was hung up on her. It felt true at the time, too. I’d changed my major in college three times before I dropped out. I held a few jobs with trickling paychecks that somehow defined who I was despite being basically picked out of a hat. And, I tried on a few different identities involving drugs, alcohol, politics, yarn, pets, clothing styles… I was all over the place.

I didn’t know how right I really was. I did need her, but not to serve as my love interest for the rest of my life. I needed her to break all the pieces of herself back out of my heart so I could love the one I was meant for. I needed her to break down the walls so I could rediscover who I really was. I needed her to mold me into something that felt wrong so I could make the trek back to feeling right. It was a long walk back, but I wouldn’t have made it if I hadn’t been broken in the beginning.

[3] People change.

Of course people change, especially if you’re 15 when you first meet them. But when you’re deep in the middle of it, it’s hard to tell how much change has really happened. When we first met, my first love was the epitome of gorgeous and wild — everything an in-the-closet lesbian would look for in a mentor. But she wasn’t a mentor, she was my peer; it just took too long for me to get her off the pedestal and look at her clearly.

The truth is, I changed too. Some of my changes were good, some were bad, but all were necessary. Nature itself is in a constant state of transition, and humans should be, too. But not all people grow together or even in the same direction. Sometimes I still feel like I changed too much to be like my first love, and I regret it every time I feel it coming out. But the truth is, for about seven years, I was hung up on this person who didn’t really exist — so I created her in myself. My priorities changed, too, but change is hard and things don’t snap back into place just how they did before. It’s a part of growing up.

[4] We weren’t good for each other.

It would be easy to cop-out and say she was all wrong for me; I heard that enough from my family over the time we were together, and I could probably recite everything they didn’t like about her by the time it was all done. The issue is that I had changed to be more like her — so every attack on her character felt like an attack on me, too. We had merged, but not in the ways that anyone sets out to.

The truth is that I said and did some horrible things to her, too. I was not innocent in our seven-year story. I may have been the one who hurt most at the end, but I brought my fair share of pain, too. I was too hung up on the roles we filled in each other’s lives that I didn’t take the time to realize what roles we needed to fill in our own lives. I longed for someone different, and so did she, but we were both too stubborn to let go of our own toxicity for long enough.

[5] I never would have met my wife.

It’s actually kind of funny; the woman I did end up marrying lived less than a block away from somewhere I spent a lot of time when I was with my ex… But we never saw each other. Or maybe we did, but we were both in our own separate (toxic) relationships at the time. Either way, we spent all this time near each other and never even looked because I’m strictly monogamous. (It’s worth noting that a few minor diversions from strict monogamy ended in absolute disaster, and while I don’t automatically equate polyamorous relationships with disaster, I know they don’t work for me.)

If I hadn’t been so messed up and determined to get someone so different than my usual “type” I never would have given my wife the time of day. Even as it stands, I had one foot out for a long time because I was waiting for the shoe to drop. But if I hadn’t been through all the mess with my first love, I never would have learned to appreciate my second love.

I’d like to take this time to formally say: Thank you, First Love. You taught me so much about myself that I never would have had the courage to look for. Thank you for being the wrong one, and setting me up so perfectly for the right one. And, while we’re at it, a big thank you to my wife for understanding (much quicker) that sometimes second choice is the real winner.

Can’t get enough of the ex drama? I’ve got a book of poems that I wrote while I was still in the middle of that relationship — check it out here.

Thankful Thursday

Come meet our family! (Again)

Posted on December 12, 2019January 15, 2020 by Babz

Hi, and welcome to Semi-Planned Chaos! This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to start a blog (this blog) for our family, but hopefully this time it’ll work out a little better than the previous iteration did. With any luck, we’ll develop a small-but-loyal following of other “unconventional families” who don’t really see themselves reflected in other family blogs. All too often, bloggers try to create this artificial life that — while beautiful — isn’t realistic. We don’t want to be that kind of blogging family (and we hope that our readers will let us know if we’re veering off in that direction).

For starters, let’s take a minute to introduce each of the chaos-creators. After all, this is our first post — we don’t know each other yet!

Babz/Mama Dragon: That’s me! I’m the primary content-creator for this blog. Before I went on hiatus to take care of our little family, I was a full-time product description and web content creator. A few times I dipped my toes into fiction-writing territory, but blogs were always where my heart returned. Truthfully, I’ve been blogging since before blogging was even called blogging… But that’s another story entirely.

I am definitely the planner of the family. At any given time, I’ve probably got at least two or three calendars going, for various activities. Planning ahead is life and it’s sometimes the only thing that keeps my sanity nearby. I’ve also been working on mastering some easy, reasonably-healthy recipes for our family — so far it’s going pretty great! I’ll share my planner tips, tricks, and hacks with you, as well as the occasional recipe to make your weeknights even better.

Bre/Mama Zombie: That’s my lovely wife. She couldn’t have possibly come into my life at a better time, and I don’t know where I’d be today if I didn’t have her. She supported me through every phase of my writing career, and continues to support me during my indefinite-hiatus. She works full-time as a casino security guard and spends most of her free time sleeping or hanging out with her family.

In our family, Bre is the doer. Day in and day out, she steps up and does the things that our family needs her to do, even when she’s not feeling completely up to it. She doesn’t waste time planning the day-to-day details because she’s got a bigger picture in mind, and she knows that together we can make our dreams a reality.

The Unicorn: Angsty, rebellious preteen – check. Sweet kid who’s just a wee bit lazy sometimes – also check. Our Unicorn is a one-in-a-million kid who usually thinks of others first, and mostly makes smart choices. Of course, she’s ten, so smart choices can be in short supply on occasion.

Although the Unicorn is the older of the two children, we actually got her after her sister. Getting caught up in school has been a tremendous challenge for her, and after a lot of hard work and dedication, she is almost back on track in school. We’ll work to share some tips for getting unmotivated kids… Well, motivated!… as soon as we get all caught up on everything else we need to do. 😉

The Baby Dragon: Baby Dragon has been with us since she was an actual baby, but now she’s four and ready to take over the world. She excels at finding loopholes, negotiating, and getting by on less sleep than everyone else in the family. She has an obsession with ocean documentaries and is currently in love with JoJo Siwa and all things associated.

Baby Dragon is currently enrolled in preschool, and it has been life-changing for us. We still don’t have too much time around school hours (in part because of the state preschool requirements that parents and guardians must participate in the classroom at least two days a month, and in part because her program is only 3 hours a day). In the time we do have, we tend to look for brain-boosting activities. We’ll try to share some of those with you guys as time allows.

Now that you’ve (virtually) met the family, why not stop in and say hello? Our comment section is always open, and we’re always looking forward to meeting new people. Tell us a little bit about yourself and what you’re most excited to read about on our blog!